Things to Ponder

Can you cry under water?

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How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered?

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Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny
for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
buried in for eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

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What disease did cured ham actually have?

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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would
be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake
up like every two hours?

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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
binoculars to look at things on the ground?

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Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see
you naked anyway.

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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song
about him?
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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the car pool lane ?

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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a
coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
both dogs!

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If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why
didn't he just buy dinner?

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If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

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Do the "Alphabet song" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" have the
same tune?

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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere,
but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your Ass?

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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad
at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out
the window?

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Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first
place?